My main feeling for the past three years has been depressed.
I'm sick of having no life.
I'm sick of feeling like no one cares.
I'm sick of being alone.
I'm sick of not feeling special at all.
I'm sick of crying.
I'm sick of being made fun of.
I'm sick of life.
I know I sound like a drama queen right now but I just need to write it down. My best friends moved away to Kansas the day after Christmas in 2005, it takes them like eight hours to drive here to visit, so they only do like four times a year maybe. None of my other friends live near me anymore either. My boyfriend doesn't live close to me either, he lives like two states away in MN. My whole life just feels like a waste. My family is fucking insane. We barely have enough money to survive right now. My brother is an inconsiderate bastard who I hate and I don't even refer to him as my brother anymore' I just refer to him by his name, I despise him. I feel so worthless lately. I have had a few panic attacks lately, it's making me think I'm going to go crazy. I feel like I cant do anything right...

I cant think of anything else to say right now so yeah, I'm just going to stop ranting now cuz I sound pretty pathetic lol.

xoxo
Carolina